The bachelor recap james weir

Whoever made the decision to install Samantha on this show is a genius.

The Bachelor: where time and space stands still and we continue to blame everything on Mel Schilling. The Bachelor mansion has been pummelled by a vulgar C-word scandal that has ended in a disgusted walkout by the man himself and left audiences searching Urban Dictionary to figure out when exactly the oddly specific insult became a thing. Will Australia be outraged at such language being broadcast repeatedly in prime time? Will people care less because it's a woman saying it about a man? And, more importantly, will we all end up somehow blaming Mel Schilling for everything again? All valid questions.

The bachelor recap james weir

All the wom-en who in-de-pen-dent. Tonight, all the contestants gather at bachelor and bachelorette parties. But this recap is not a comprehensive catalogue of all the single weirdos. We will only be shining a spotlight on the top shelf freaks. Well, you are just a breath of fresh air, Melissa. After just 40 seconds, we feel like we know everything about Melissa. She loves sex and her favourite singer is probably P! Then Melissa struts across the room and corners Sandy. Melissa sees herself as somewhat of a sexy Yoda. Yeah, girls. Show some respect! Learn from her experience! Melissa then sits each of the girls down for private chats where she mum-splains how sex works.

An appropriate reaction to a certified sheet freak. We run off to find Abbie and Matt to see what their boring Central Coast date entails.

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Melissa Mason. You know when you go through the security bit at the airport and you immediately become hyper-paranoid, like wait maybe I have a secret gun in my bag? That paranoia is how I feel about The Bachelors Australia after all this hoo-ha with shifting launch dates and a very suspicious January 9 premiere. Not that I think The Bachelors Australia is going to turn into a Hunger Games bloodbath although honestly, for ratings, I can see it in our future. I need this season to be good!! Osher is fucking selling it to us, though. They probably paid him with one large skyscraper.

The bachelor recap james weir

This week, Joey met four families — and then sent a frontrunner home. This week on The Bachelor , by the numbers: Four hometown dates, one shocking departure, and three final women for Joey. Date No. Kelsey greets Joey with a huju , as required by Bachelor law.

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As Harrison gets ready on his wedding day, he continues to prove how slick and suave he is. Now comes the time in the episode where the experts step in to match everyone. Osher needs to take notes. And he was the person I was warned about. Search New Zealand Herald. She said it as a joke," she tells Matt. To us it looks a little less James Bond and a little more Diane Keaton. He really likes Abbie, but he wants to get to the bottom of these claims. That defence is bulletproof. It's the same drill as last time.

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She regales him with a succession of random tales and facts — including one about a trip she took to a dairy and how she loved the teat suction machine. Mel B has embraced her most 'freeing' years yet. She hears everything he says about her. We will only be shining a spotlight on the top shelf freaks. It makes the villain edit a breeze. She told me about this guy that is going on to MAFS that she has been dating for the last month and a half. But enough about these randoms. Tonight, cantaloupes are hurled around like crazy. Congratulations on becoming a step mum, Bron xx. Osher needs to take notes. Look, I'm not going to talk for other people. The hum from the kreepy krauly pool vacuum fills the silence. So obnoxious.